


Id Serenity

by newmrsdewinter



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Almost Fluff, Birthday, Child Neglect, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Protective Siblings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-04
Updated: 2016-10-04
Packaged: 2018-08-19 10:57:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8203193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newmrsdewinter/pseuds/newmrsdewinter
Summary: Chrobinweek 2016, Day 1: Coming of AgeLuci's father is nothing but the empty shell of the hero he once was before Grima's defeat. She's certain that he loves her, but his strong arms never hold her as tightly as she knows they could. Her mother was the fairy tale end of a dream she couldn’t remember no matter how hard rubbed her eyes when she woke up. Little Lucina wasn't an orphan, but she was raised to think like one.For all of Robin's apparent wisdom, her disappearance has a far more reaching consequence on her family than she could have ever foretold. It doesn't help that Chrom hates being at home because his daughter reminds him too much of his dead wife.Takes place post-game after Grima's defeat





	

 

 

Little Luci doesn't know what it's like to have parents.

When she was young, her maids told her that her parents left Ylisstol to fight a war across the sea and they'd be home when it was all over. Owain loved to tell her stories about their exploits - tall tales of billowing white capes, fiery skirmishes across the sea, magic swords, and even a glowing, mystical shield studded with gemstones. He swore that all the stories were true, and his only proof was that he was alive to tell them to her. True or not, Chrom and Robin returned home from Valm for a brief spell before they left to fight a dragon, but they didn't stay long enough for Luci to make any lasting memories with them.

Now that Grima was gone and vanquished, her father was home but her mother was nowhere to be found.

Luci loves her father, but she hardly knows him. Whenever Chrom is home long enough to play with her, he is silent and he likes to stroke her hair. Sometimes he speaks, but it doesn't feel like he's talking to her because he's hard to understand. She's certain that he loves her too, but his strong arms never hold her as tightly as she wishes they would. His laughter is much too forced to be sincere, and his jokes lacked the punch they must have had before she was born.

Everyone liked to think that she didn’t remember a single thing about her mother, and she liked to pretend it too. Real secrets were a rarity in the big castle, so she kept what she had close to her heart. Her mother was the fairy tale end of a wonderful dream she couldn’t remember no matter how hard rubbed her eyes when she woke up. A pink, cloudy dream that seemed to chug for far too long and one that ended much too soon. Mother was every rose petal floating in the fountain, the open books left forgotten in the library with pages well-thumbed. The stacks of beautiful pictures, and watercolors melting off the pages and staining her fingers. Mother was invisible.

In the world swirling behind Luci's eyes, she remembers a woman holding her close to her breast. She pinned colorful tacks to a map hanging on the wall. Father stood next to her and they spoke quietly. Her perfume was heavenly. She smelled like the rose water caught in the crystal bottle in Father’s bedchambers.

But invisible people can’t give hugs even if they must have existed before. Memories can’t keep her warm at night, can’t quell the nightmares or kiss her blistered fingers and scraped knees.

On most days, Luci could count on Lucina to give her a hug, but she only did it when she thought no one was looking. Truthfully, big sis wasn’t very good at it. Her arms were lanky and awkward, and she always fumbled as though no one ever taught her how to give a hug either when she was a little girl. Granted, no one ever taught Luci, but she thought Lucina knew how to do everything. She could read, tie knots, tell time, and she knew a lot about flowers. But she gave bad hugs.

Aunt Lissa was pregnant and she swallowed a planet, so her tummy was much too big to give anyone a hug. Uncle Lon'qu was out of the question, but he didn’t seem to mind catching butterflies with her. He was weird.

Owain liked squeezing the life out of her whenever he hugged her. He said she would explode if he hugged her as much as he loved her, so he held himself back every time. She didn’t like it.

And Morgan was just as mythical as mother. He never looked at her long enough so that she could see the color of his eyes. From what little she gleaned from the scullery maid and the stable hand, he vanished in the dead of the night after a quarrel with father. She liked to imagine that his eyes were as blue as father’s, but lighter than Lucina’s. They were a perfect medium. He probably gave okay hugs, so he was only second to mother, who must have given the best hugs of all.

But it was never a part of her decorum to demand a hug when she was feeling lonely. Her governess would never allow it, and her maids always maintained that good behavior would always be rewarded by her mother’s eventual return.

So she stayed put.

 

* * *

 

On April 20th, the barracks were assailed by a veritable storm of streamers and confetti. Lucina had never seen Cynthia and Severa decorate with such frenzied fervor, and their dedication was quite unsettling. Every inch of the stone walls was plastered with bunting and silvery metallic paper.

Most of the children from the future were in Ylisstol to celebrate, and some of the Shepherds too. Chrom was away for business in Plegia. Morgan vowed never to return until his mother had been found.

And Robin was still gone. She had been gone for a very long time now.

The birthday girl sat at the head of the table with a crestfallen pout. Little Luci's head was dwarfed by a massive flower crown of peonies, daisies, and baby's breath. The fallen petals were scattered around her elbows.

"Happy birthday!" cried Cynthia. Her voice carried a mild note of hysteria. "Eat your cake! Aren't you gonna make a wish?"

"And you'd better like it," added Severa. "Kjelle and I woke up at the ass crack of dawn to bake it, so -" Nah shoved her head roughly to the side before she could finish her sentence, scowling at her immaturity.

Lucina watched as Luci regarded the cake set before her with mild trepidation. Kjelle swore that it was edible, but the green tinge on Brady's face said otherwise. There were six candles set in the droopy icing - one for each of the birthdays Chrom and Robin had missed. Luci nodded forlornly and blew the candles out. A few persisted with a faint flicker, but Laurent quietly snuffed them out with a wind tome before she could cry.

Lucina was at a loss. Chrom wasn't there, and he left for Plegia knowing that he was going to miss Luci's birthday. The sweetest cake in the castle would never be able to amend for his absence. So she smiled weakly and nudged her sister forward.

"Thank you for the cake," said Luci quietly, picking at the icing with her fork. She took a small bite and Inigo stifled a dry-heave. Her face froze for the tiniest fraction of a second, but she swallowed thickly and wiped her mouth with her napkin.

A grave silence followed, but they were all saved when Gerome and Frederick came late with an armful of wrapped presents.

Gerome opened a cake box. "Cherche made a better cake," he said gruffly. "She saw the disaster in the kitchen this morning and took pity."

The effect was immediate. While everyone rushed to claim a slice, Frederick limped forward and offered Lucina an apologetic smile. "Have we missed the presents?"

"Not yet," said Lucina quietly, stealing a furtive glance at Luci. Her little sister remained seated, ignoring Gerome and his cake. Luci clonked her forehead on the table and wiped her tears behind her hand. "She hasn't been difficult, just...subdued."

"I can't say I'm thrilled either," confessed Frederick, shaking his head. "Lord Chrom insisted on making the trip to Plegia alone - not even I can sway your lord father's mind when he makes a decision."

They all heard with their own ears that Chrom wouldn't be back until spring was over and Luci accepted it. But _of course_   he'd be home for her birthday. That was just given. True, he never promised that he'd be back in time for the party, and he never made a promise he couldn't keep, but still - it hurt.

Frederick's face was a grim mask of displeasure as he clanked over to Luci's side. He tilted her chin up with his hand. Lucina watched his knightly resolve give way when he held his arms aloft, inviting Luci into his strong embrace. "Milady, what miracle shall I perform to see you smile again?" he asked gently. Luci tumbled into his arms and muffled her cries into his shoulder.

For the briefest moment, Lucina felt a twinge of envy tug her heart, but it vanished as quickly as it came. It was only natural for Luci to cling to him, Chrom's most stalwart knight. Frederick had dealt with such tears before from Lissa, and perhaps even Emmeryn when they were girls growing into women, so he knew to take Luci into his arms when she didn't have a father who could.

Still sniffling, Luci met him with a watery doe-eyed expression, her face still flushed with the tears streaking down her cheeks. "C-Can you bring him home?" Her words were punctuated by tiny gasps. "What about mother? Can you bring her back too?"

A high flush rose up to Frederick's ears. "Alas, milady. I'm afraid...not."

"Why?"

Lucina closed her eyes. It would have been easy for Frederick to say that Chrom was needed away from the castle for important matters of state, that treaties had to be signed with the newly-formed Plegian delegation, that Robin had performed a miracle on Origin Peak so that Luci could have a birthday to celebrate, that they were gone for every reason in the world except that they had simply chosen not to be there to see her turn six.

In Frederick's arms, Luci narrowed her eyes, almost daring him to say something. Evasion and flowery speak would never fool Robin's six-year-old daughter.

"They will be back," he said finally. "I shall die before I allow another member of the Exalted bloodline to disappear on my watch."

Luci's face fell even further without seeming to move very much at all. "Don't say that. _Don't_ say die."

Frederick stiffened at upsetting her. "I apologize, milady. Your father is in good hands in Plegia. He _will_ return alive and well to celebrate your birthday next year. I'll make sure of it."

Crestfallen, Luci was on the verge of a fresh batch of tears and she nodded mournfully. "Okay," she said eventually, making it perfectly clear that it wasn't.

After a brief pause, it seemed that a compromise was made in Frederick's conflicted heart. "Very well, milady." He took Lissa's discarded flower crown and placed it onto his head. He tied the silk ribbon under his chin. "I shall wear it with the dignity befitting the most devoted godfather," he said solemnly.

The grave look on his face, his ridiculous armor, and the way he squared his shoulders with reverent determination - all of that with the flowers on his head - it was enough to send Luci giggling herself breathless.

Lucina cracked a smile for the first time that day and the tension finally lifted.

 

* * *

 

After the last crumb of cake had been consumed and swept away, Owain lifted Luci onto his shoulders and carried her towards the mountain of presents on the table. "Gifts from my boon companions! Which shall you choose first?"

With a shy smile, she reached for the biggest box. "I want that one."

Luci was interrupted by a loud noise. "Here you are, dear!" said Maribelle breathlessly. She glided down the stone steps and Vaike followed behind a long package under his arms. "Fashionably late as usual, but have no fear."

"What is it?" asked Luci distractedly.

"Open it and you'll see," said Maribelle with a vague smile, accepting a cup of tea from Frederick.

She untied the ribbons and gasped. "A parasol!" She opened it and twirled it in the air.

"Baby blue to match your hair, darling," said Maribelle fondly. "You're practically a lady now."

"I can use it to save the chickens from the sun."

Maribelle winced but placed a prim kiss on her forehead anyway.

As the minutes passed, the crinkle of wrapping paper filled the room and the ground was soon littered with ribbons and bows. With a shy grin, Luci surveyed the presents laid out before her, everything from Olivia's dancing shoes to Owain's naming book and Cynthia's toy lance.

When the time was right, Lucina pulled a small parcel from behind her back and handed it to her. "It's from Morgan."

"Big brother?" Luci asked. She tore the paper open and discovered a miniature chessboard, packaged with the note that he'd teach her how to play when he returned home.

"Does this mean he's coming back tomorrow?" she asked hopefully.

"I'm afraid not."

She pushed it away. "Big sis, did you get me anything?"

"Of course," Lucina said, a little embarrassed. With trembling fingers, she reached for a clumsily wrapped package. Inside was a scarf knitted the most outrageous shade of pink and Luci squealed with delight. She wrapped it around her neck and planted a multitude of wet kisses on her sister's cheek.

Owain burst into laughter. "This is a threatened world indeed if our once and future Exalt must reign under such ridiculous apparel!"

"It's not ridiculous," said Luci, scowling. The scarf clashed terribly with her hair. "It's beautiful, like daddy's cape."

Moments later, Frederick strode forward and cleared his throat. "If I may, I'd like to gift the last present to the princess." He offered her a sad smile. "It's from your father."

Luci sucked in a sharp gasp and bolted upright. "Freddie, please! I need to see it!" She tugged on his arm until he relented and he ruffled her head when he placed the package on the table.

Everyone huddled around her to take a look.

A note fell out of the package when she tore it open. She gave the messy scrawl a cursory glance and tossed it away, diving for the present hidden underneath.

"Hold for a moment, Luci. What did it say?"

"I dunno, I can't read," said Luci, as though that should have been obvious. She set down the package and peered at the note from over Lucina's shoulder.

Lucina rolled her eyes and undid the wax seal.

 _My littlest princess,_  
_I am so lucky to have you in my life. Enclosed is a box as pretty as you are. In the future, it'll hold all the trinkets I'll gift you for all of your birthdays henceforth. Consider this gift number one. Lucina will safeguard it for you until you are old enough to understand what it means._

Lucina lifted her eyes from the parchment and her vision turned misty. Frederick pressed a small envelope into her hand. It contained a delicate gold chain. Robin's engagement ring was looped on the end, the diamond glinting madly in the slant of sunlight streaming from the window.

_Our bonds are what give us strength. They are not always bound by blood, but they will always shine through when times are darkest. It's unfair of me to ask you to come of age before your life has even begun, but I am certain that six years is plenty to forge lifelong friendships and many more in the future._

_Wishing my girls the happiest birthday,_  
_Chrom_

The void left by the absent Exalted family was more pronounced than ever.

"Chrom has absolutely no right to make me cry like this," sniffled Lissa, wiping her tears with her sleeve. "He's not even here to make fun of me for it!"

"That's not the entire present," said Frederick quietly, breaking the tense silence. He nudged Luci forward. "Go on. Open it."

Luci lifted a polished wooden box out of the parcel. It was embossed with dragons and its feet were inlaid with ivory and gold. The heavy perfume of sandalwood and jasmine filled the air and she sneezed. When she opened it, the box played a familiar lilting tune. Luci's clear blue eyes widened in surprise, but there was also a sense of acknowledgment and understanding in them. "What's this song?"

 _Id serenity._ It was the lullaby Robin used to hum her to sleep when she was born, a soothing melody that imprinted itself in Luci's memory without even realizing it. Lucina recognized it immediately and her throat hitched. The music box was a reminder that comforted her more than a thousand empty reassurances could.

Chrom's message was implicit, but the gesture spoke louder than any shouted declaration could.

_Wait for us and we'll come back. I promise._

Mourning and sulking served little purpose in this brave new world of peace. All they had to do was wait.

**Author's Note:**

> I admit to cheating ChrobinWeek and here's how I did it:  
> 1.) Chrom and Robin aren't actually in the fic LMAOO
> 
> EDIT: 20 minutes later and I finally remember my author's note. This is a scrapped chapter from "Morning Glory," my submission for @ingrimasname "Brave New World" FE:A fanfic zine. Please read the whole zine and let the other authors know what you thought of their work!
> 
> and yes, I did change the summary three times. sue me.


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